Hot Shots & Cold Noodles

And how much I hate packing

I hate packing so much that I’m procrastinating heavily by writing.

It’s not so much that I hate packing, it’s actually that I hate flying. So any activity that precedes flying or reminds me of flying, is bound to be an activity that induces anxiety.

Why do I hate it so much? Well, I’m glad you asked.

First off, I am not one of those fortunate people who can just sit on a plane and fall asleep before takeoff. If I don’t have a significant amount of anti-anxiety meds in me, I’m not sleeping. I also need my Trtl Pillow to hold my head/neck up or I will fall over into the aisle or onto my neighbor’s shoulder. It’s uncomfortable for everyone.

Oh, and if there’s any extended amount of turbulence, I will have a mini panic attack. Or a full blown panic attack where my legs lock up, I sweat profusely, and feel like vomiting. That has only happened once but still, would be great if it weren’t even an option.

So anyway, here I sit watching Hot Shots, writing to you fine people, and eating sesame cold noodles from Vanessa’s Dumplings (and obviously dumplings). See below for a drool worthy shot of the noodles and the boiled wontons (chicken/shrimp) in garlic, scallions, chili oil and cilantro. You know how I feel about cilantro but I can tolerate it in small doses and thankfully this is minimal. It just fucking works. The pan-fried pork and chive dumplings are my second fave.

Cold Noodles in Sesame Sauce

Boiled Wontons w/garlic, chili oil, scallions, cilantro

Anyway, as I was watching Hot Shots and laughing just as hard now as I did 20 years ago, it got me thinking about how I sorta fell in love with this style of comedy, and I owe this one to my Dad.

When I was a kid, my brother and I spent every weekend with my Dad (divorced parents - you get it), and watching movies was a big part of our time together. My Dad loves two types of movies: action and comedy. My mom, on the other hand, she loves dramas, murder porn, and any film with subtitles. Needless to say, I took after my Dad on this one.

In terms of comedies, Hot Shots was in heavy rotation, as well as The Naked Gun movies, Spaceballs, Airplane, and anything with Jim Carrey. I’m pretty sure we still have The Mask on VHS. But I digress.

The thing I love most about spoof films are the details. That’s why, when I started making these skits for IG, I made sure to pay attention to the little things. For example, in Hot Shots, the name of the battleship is “SS. Essess.” So simple but so fucking good. Or in Spaceballs, the name of one of the “colonels” is “Colonel Sanders.”

I could name about 20 of these, but overall, I think you get my point. It’s the little things that take it from just silly to actually kind of genius.

The other thing I love about these movies is the absurd physical comedy. It’s almost like watching a cartoon sometimes. I was on a date once and the guy said my movie taste was “childish” but “not in a bad way.” Obviously I did not see him again for a variety of other reasons, but this is how I explained it: my life was always kind of filled with drama, so when I wanted to escape my own reality, that meant something light. Something that would make me smile and make me laugh. If choosing a laugh when your world already has a lot of tears makes you a child then…so be it?

I’ll leave you with that. I gotta go back to eating and packing. But…more to come from LONDON BABY.